Stress can destroy you from the inside out — I’m a perfect example

I have pretty bad back pain. Three of my vertebrae aren’t exactly in the right place, so that combined with a day job where I sit all day at a desk disproportionate to my height means some pretty serious issues.

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In the last month, I’ve seen an osteopath, a Proprioceptive Deep Tendon Reflex (P-DTR) massage therapist and an Ayurvedic practitioner. Though their fields of work seem far apart, their main focus remains the same: the body.

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Repost @modoyogagriffintown 🙏🏼🙏🏼🙏🏼 How do you know the difference between when it’s time to stay and when it’s time to go? Have you ever hoped for something and then an opportunity presented itself, but then suddenly you don’t know if that’s what you really wanted? When does a leap of faith triumph stability? That’s what I’m trying to figure out right now. Any advice? ———————————— Comment savez-vous la différence entre le temps de rester et partir? Avez-vous déjà souhaité avoir quelque chose, mais lorsque l’opportunité arrive, vous n’êtes plus sur? Quand est-ce qu’un acte de foi triomphe sur la stabilité? C’est ce que j’essaie de comprendre en ce moment. Des avis? 📷: @michael_libis

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Each of them told me, in their own words, that my body is in stress mode, with tension the most intense in my chest and neck area — basically, my heart and throat chakras are blocked due to emotional stress and anxieties.

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A bit of a bummer… I was hoping that my back pain (that also extends to my neck, shoulders, elbows, hips and knees) could be fixed with some physical therapy. Looks like I need actual therapy, therapy.

The Ayurvedic practitioner, Vanesa, explained it best:

As a pitta-vata type, my natural strength lies in being a leader. I am assertive, strong-willed and determined. Yet, over the last few years I’ve been told by supervisors that “I am not the boss. If I am told to do something, the only appropriate response is ‘yes, of course.'”

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So, when Vanesa told me I need to assert my pitta, my immediate response was: “I’ve been told I come off too aggressive and people keep telling me to sit down.”

Her answer: show compassion to yourself, and to others.


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Repost @modoyogagriffintown: 🧘🏼‍♀️🙏🏼 Folding forward. I used to hate this pose. One of the things yoga has taught me is patience…not something I’ve ever been very good at. I’ve always been used to getting my way and getting things done — fast. As I’ve gotten older, I’ve come to realize that not everything comes easy. Accolades, relationships, respect. But with yoga, and with patience, I’ve come to realize that great things can — and will —come when you’re surrounded by good people. ———————————— Plier en deux. Je détestais cette posture, il n’y a pas très longtemps. Une chose que le yoga m’a appris, c’est la patience…quelque chose que je ne comprenais jamais. J’ai toujours été habitué à faire ce que je voulais — vite. En grandissant, je réalise que rien ne vient facilement. Des accolades, des relations, le respect. Mais avec le yoga et la patience, je viens de voir que de bonnes choses peuvent — et vont — arriver quand nous sommes entourés par des gens formidables. 📷: @michael_libis

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My imbalance, she explained, is that I am too harsh on myself; I compete against myself and am always questioning how I could have done something better or faster — and then, this high (impossible) standard that I hold myself to, I project onto others.

My intense emotional imbalance isn’t just blocking my chakras — my out-of-place vertebrae are directly associate with the heart… and control — but it’s also starting to cause additional problems.

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I’ve started having problems catching my breath because my diaphragm isn’t moving properly… because it’s getting stuck in my chest and causing blockage on my right side, where the liver is — the organ associated to feelings of anger.

At one point I couldn’t sleep, I couldn’t get my heartbeat to calm down to its normal resting rate — usually 52 beats per minute — and I felt such a heavy weight hovering over me that I was feeling nauseous almost all the time.

It’s a bit of a bummer to find out that your physical pain can’t be fixed with a quick massage or a chiropractor’s crack.

My prescription: daily meditation, self-care practices (like oil pulling and dry brushing) and practicing compassion towards myself.

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🧘🏼‍♀️ Le yoga a été ma réponse à plusieurs de mes questionnements lors des dernières années. Ces jours-ci, je suis mal à l’aise au travail, ce qui me fait questionner si je prends des bonnes décisions. Donc, je remets mon focus sur le bien-être, la santé et le yoga 🙏🏼 Et tout commence à s’aligner. ———————————— 🧘🏼‍♀️ Yoga has been the answer to so many of my questions over the years. I’ve been having a pretty terrible time at work lately and it’s made me question whether I’m making the right choices professionally. So, I’ve decided to refocus my energy towards wellness, health and yoga 🙏🏼 And things are falling into place all on their own.

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I also had to make two difficult professional decisions that meant cutting back on work to take care of myself.

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It’s still a little early to tell how that has changed my stress and anxiety levels, but I’m really looking forward to being able to breathe a little easier for the first time in…two years?

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